Gillingham, Kent, United Kingdom
Body type:
Home and family
Marital status:
Single / never married 
In my own words:

F**K I’m nearly 41!!!

Well, I've had Colitis since I was 19 so that took care of college and dating. I eventually needed surgery in April 2015. After several more surgeries and further procedures later (7 in total), I now live with an ileostomy, cured of colitis but with some other post-surgery complications.

With a myriad of life challenges and overcoming multiple adversities throughout my life both health and non-health related, I was once a strong, resilient man. But 2019 was my worst year. It broke me. I gained a tonne of weight, became severely depressed and suffered from anxiety. I locked myself away and stopped communicating with friends and family. The smallest of things would set me off thinking it’s the end of the world or make me emotional. Yes, I contemplated… well let’s not go there.

But in later part of 2019, with inspiration and help from several books and YouTube videos I decided enough was enough!! I can’t keep living this way. I literally Forced myself to think differently. Reset my mindset and started from scratch. I started to be grateful for all of the small things I do have that I began to take for granted. Long story short, I am now in a better place but of course not perfect.

Every day is hard and I acknowledge my positive mindset is fragile. I know I must earn confidence and a positive outlook DAILY. It’s not infinite and it’s not free. Life is hard and life can suck, the sooner we accept that as definitive, we can try to focus our energies on what we can change. In turn finding those things that make us happy.

Luckily throughout everything I still have my humour!

It would be really nice to meet people and make friends with men and women to discuss the joys, sadness, challenges of life and see who has been poked in the bum more over the years. Bet I win.

I want to try to help and motivate people to get out of their rut and to look forward to life instead of resenting it.

I’m not on here just for dating alone so if any males (or females) want to chat, get in touch!

Love you all, bye!!!

Colitis; Don't fail because of it, Succeed Despite It
Always SDI > Always Succeed Despite It

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 Mandy1308, Woman 54  Coventry West Midlands
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 MrMan365, Man 41  Gillingham Kent
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 MrMan365, Man 41  Gillingham Kent
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MrMan365 posted:

Hi sexy people.
I recommend you sign up for the quarterly magazine, Tidings by Colostomy UK.
Its a useful read!

 Goodvibz, Woman 38  Newquay Cornwall

I will most definitely be having a look. Xx

 MrMan365, Man 41  Gillingham Kent
MrMan365 posted a new blog:

Does anyone attend any Stoma Support groups?I attended my first one this week after months of feeling too anxious to go. But a huge thanks to Elliot for coming with me! I found it interesting so a thank you to the organisers, Tracey & Helen at MOGS.We are not alone with our daily struggles, pain…

 Lifeisforliving, Woman 54  Brighton East Sussex

Fab post, I only had my ileostomy for 8 months, but during that time I was in hospital as sepsis shock made me paralyzed for 4 months, the journey of acceptance that the bag saved my life was the easy part for me, it was the challenges of being totally rehabilitated believe me there were times when I thought I would never walk, talk or eat again, the emotional rollercoaster was so hard, but pushing through and realising I can do this, I can get my life back. ❤

 Goodvibz, Woman 38  Newquay Cornwall

Great post and great words of wisdom babe. It will inspire many, and resonate with alot im sure. It takes courage and strength to have even opened up on OD. I know you will definitely reach many people and in turn make a difference to someone who has felt the same. Very kind and thoughtful. I want to say a big personal thankyou to Elliot Grin you really helped Ayhan and for that im thankful. Xxx

 MrMan365, Man 41  Gillingham Kent
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